Looking Forward

I would have never thought in July that i'd be at this point. I never would have thought that when I was realizing things about myself, that i'd also get myself onto a path - a six month rollercoaster. (Think, school, people, home) I would have never thought that i'd be sitting in a gorgeous cafe, i wouldn't have imagined myself having my camera welded to my hand, nor would i have imagined myself this happy. at this point, no matter what my mother or father throw at me (i expect a lot of anger, ect, when they find out about my report card, decision to not go to university yet, ect) it won't really bug me. I never knew what was coming to me six months ago- but all I knew is that I was trying, that I was striving for something- I was trying to pull something out of myself. As of now, it's a miserable hiatus, I try to keep busy with my own things, even just settling my ideas and mind into small mini shoots- I'm at least trying. I absolutely hate work, my jobs are great jobs, but they're totally lame beyond belief. It's not even close to what i'd see myself doing- nor would any path my parents would want me to go. I have a feeling the next six months will be beyond miserable in some aspects, but the end of it, July, and the summer, the weather- the heat, the quay, the late nights, the cafes, the coffee, the early mornings, the subjects and the massive windows- will be the only thing that is necessary. Even though things are useless and a waste of time, perhaps these few months are necessary for some more practise- to get myself ready for whatever's to come. i'm sure it'll be a very very very interesting summer.